Quentin Tarantino announced this evening that he will be directing the Scaramucci biopic, to be released early in 2018. The biopic, with the working title, “Sewer Dogs”, will focus on Scaramucci’s brief tenure as White House communications director and the infighting with Sean Spicer and Reince Priebus.Speaking to reporters this evening, Tarantino said, “We had some footage left from the final scene of Reservoir Dogs that I’ve wanted to use for years, and today’s decision by John Kelly gave me the perfect opportunity. Anthony’s already signed on and we’re in early negotiations with Sean and Reince”.
So ends one of the longest weeks in political history. A week in which Anthony Scaramucci quickly transitioned from smooth to coarse, making some interesting observations about fellow White House staff in a profanity-laced New York Times interview, especially regarding yoga-loving Steve Bannon.News broke late in the week that Scaramucci’s wife had filed for divorce, citing Donald Trump as the other party after Scaramucci proclaimed undying love for the President just a week earlier.With his personal life in tatters, Scaramucci finally turned to Bannon for advice. “Steve calls this position ‘the fandango’. I’m still not sure how he does it”, a source inside the White House quoted Scaramucci as saying, “After a week of trying, this is a close as I can get, but Steve’s promised to act as my personal trainer until one of us gets fired”.
Donald Trump publicly criticized Steve Bannon and Jared Kusher this weekend for “consistently hurting the Trump brand”. His stinging attack was aimed at the pair’s questionable fashion choices, which the president feels is negatively impacting the Trump fashion line, and sales of other Trump related merchandise.This morning Trump nominated daughter Ivanka to the newly created “White House dresser” role and gave her specific instructions to “work this out”.
Tired of getting his intelligence reports from “fake media”, President Trump yesterday announced an executive order which replaces the current Fox & Friends line-up with a group of presenters hand-picked by the president himself.Trump announced, “I was so tired of having to get dressed in the morning for my daily briefings. Now I can stay in my pjs and get the same high-quality content, with no actual changes to the information sources. My only regret is treating Steve Doocy so unfairly by replacing him with Steve Douchebag.”